naked.

as i ‘was’(AM) walking this empty street the suns heat draining of what lil energy thats been controlling my backbone,i feel the worlds gravity has doubled up on me and every step is so freakin painful i wish id just fall down and break my skull;that way i wont remember what happened minutes ago. i feel so weak. so useless. zero value. the world hates me. he just want me to lose myself and he destroyed everything that i worked for. to start all over again and wrap myself up with tissue paper and pretend that i am a zombie, numb to every pain. the lil things that u do makes me feel so special, and i forgot how enchanting u make me feel and when u reminded me of that, every particle is like a bullet piercing through my soul,fragments shredding my sanity and there i was again, bleeding profusely and u just stared at me. u rily think u know how i felt, dontcha? good thing the bullet went through. once again im going to die and i wud like to kip it this way,me-DEAD.

"You took it back
How could you go and do something like that
My fingernail phase
Worst has got the best of you
I ask you and I know I need to change
You took it back
You ripped my heart out of me then you put it back
I’m pulling my hair
I let you just a million times
I love you even though it isn’t fair

Change
Run we go around again in circles
Play this game over again" **theUSED>

shyet. im still sick and as time ascends im geing sour. yup. im still H2o-sober, for the past days taking a shower aint part of my agenda and im enjoying the thought that id get a nice clean shower one of these days. does that make me selfish/self centered ? maybe. but then again i never heard sum1 complain about me smellin like my good friend -dellS socks. guess my friends are too kind or im just a walking talking deodorant heheh. watevur. im hapi. y am i here in me blog again? im here to say ‘HI! and i lovya ol! amigos and amigas! =)’ hehehe mao rato. sibat sako kay mag inom pa daw mi - ur sick and sour friend - xandurrrrr

Passion and commitment. heheheh (its sooooooooo freakin hard to commit these days) harhar….. it leads to an awareness that not everything is as perfect as it seems; it leads to love. To love, is to experience life at its best and its worst. You can never say that I’ve tasted REALITY till you experience it. Love. You and me. Us tasting the tongue of life, the bittersweet fruit of hope and betrayal. It was and it happened, we stared at each other’s eyes not knowing that the sweet glare will soon become a bitter nightmare. “love.loss.tragedy”…and now. Smiles everywhere as though it is just a dream, look back but continue moving forward. Hold but not to tight. Let go and be happy. Confusing, isn’t it? This is life, this is love. Welcome to our world. Yup, this is reality. Like it or not, this is the blueprint of life. We are the artists of our own lives but we have a pattern to follow. We can choose a road but the road was already made for us. Call it freedom, for me its not; but then again there are these questions that we can’t answer. Am lost again, suffocated by the mysterious works of the unknown.
I have to get out, my lung longs for fresh air, my lung wants you.